The Take

 It was a day like any other. The night stood still with no winds in sight. The fan’s oscillations did their very best to disperse the moisture to decrease the humidity of the atmosphere, but its attempts were futile. Nevertheless, the battle to take a night’s rest ensued. The battlefield was set. The calvaries marched forward. Serene Slumber battling the Indomitable Insomnia. Both armies brought forward their arsenal, attacking anything against annihilation. This meant war- one that would create the imagery of World War II being a mere school fight at recess. The stakes were high, and who will take the victory to conquer Slumberland could be dependent on more than just who executes their strategies more effectively.

 Serene Slumber sent out their firing line of shots of cold cocomania immediately after their Calvary, indicating that by any means necessary, this battle is theirs for the taking. However, the Indomitable Insomnia, dissembled their tactics and gave the impression of retreat as their soldiers smirked from a distance. The opposition took the bait and attacked the forts of Insomnia, with the misconception that they had the advantage. Little did they know that this was the location for Insomnia’s Five-Star Generals.

“It’s a trap!” they screamed in terror as they stumbled upon their discovery.

 

“You’re surrounded!” the Generals laughed as they shone their 3000 lumens flashlights in their faces.

 

“What were you expecting? they ridiculed with rhetorics…. “this land is our territory now, and you are now our slaves, captured in combat, to execute our agendas for evermore, regardless of how nefarious they might be.”

The Slumber militia realized the precarious predicament they were in and it stroked fear in their minds.

It was at this point that the General for the Insomniacs; Jimi Hendrix deployed an extra layer of defense around the perimeter of the battlefield, with Jenny Aniston as the Lieutenant General who will be able to lead from her experience.

 

“Cue the music!” “Cue the music!” were the orders being shrieked by the second and third platoons of the Slumber army.

 

Jimi and his soldiers were shocked. Bamboozled. Stunned at the depth of their enemy’s battalion, but also respected their efforts. Despite that, they were never dismayed. The second platoon charged with onto the battlefield with a plethora of sleep sounds ranging from tranquility of spa music, to the more aggressive rain and thunderstorm sounds. One after the other. Serene Slumber attacked the epicenter of the war, reclaiming a foothold of the battlefield. The Insomniacs retreated and regrouped and watched as they danced to the tunes of their palpably premature and  pyrrhic celebrations.

Being as nefarious as they’re known for, the Insomniacs unleashed Operation Enigma with the troops that had made a perimeter around the battlefield. As they closed in on the celebrations and made the battlefield smaller, they charged in.

 

“It’s a trap! It’s a trap!” they screamed as the celebrations were cut short.

 

The battlefield however, was still intact despite the rumblings and bombs being dropped.

“Charge to the core!” Lieutenant General Aniston ordered as she aimed to conquer this new found land. She got swept away in the army of fighters and luckily stumbled upon the battlefield’s corps. Aniston took a pull on its phallus to declare victory. Slumberland was now theirs. Owned by the Insomniacs. The Serene Slumber soldiers were no where to be found. Just the evidences of their attempts laying around.

 

“They fought valiantly,” she said, as she commenced her victory speech. “But the night is ours for the taking for evermore!”

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